Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
怀着挑剔的心去看，但说不出不喜欢三个字。但也没必要那么大包袱，确实看得开心，就像一盘没下完的棋。其中几个点特别特别戳我。比如男人喜欢一个女人，就本能得觉得自己要对她好，开始施加情感压力，好可笑哦。就比如男人自以为自己能克制ego，是新好男人，但一旦情绪崩不住又变回公牛，好可笑哦。就比如女人……没了
说实话有点没太看懂导演主要想要表达什么，但剧情片来说也算是中规中矩吧，有些小的点还是能get到的
强烈推荐，最近很长一段时间以来看过的最好的电影，既有让人捧腹的上海话爆笑桥段，也有让人深思与回味的人生百态。作为上海男人，相比片中的徐峥，自己真是自愧不如，哪怕有白老师三分之一的实力，我也心满意足。片中三个上海女人，两个上海男人，都各有风情，自成格调，构成一副五彩斑斓的画幅。唯一美中不足的是白老师的儿子，台词很尴尬，角色也拿捏得别扭，在几个成熟且经验丰富的老演员当中显得格格不入，听一起去看的对粉圈有研究的同学说是个流量小生，只能说难怪。另外自己一直对原生家庭感到尴尬，在人前有点抬不起头，看到片中四十四岁的马伊琍还要被老娘指指点点罐头管脚，已经离婚的徐峥还要被老娘逼着要复婚，家里的东西随便拿来拿去，我顿时释然了。总之，感觉自己作为上海男人距离徐峥老师差距还太遥远，要尽力活出上海男人的风情（笑哭
能够見出許多方面的電影/文學傳統，例如法國香頌般的都市小品、伍迪·艾倫的片子、“愛在”三部曲，還有上海的通俗文藝傳統。能把這三個女人的一臺戲拍得俗而不“油”，原因在於影片從不試圖展現絕對的人設和極端的感情，同時在把這整件事拍出來之外，並不刻意誘導觀眾勒索更豐沛的意義。儘管主人公的生活狀態又讓我想到王朔筆下的某些北京人，但該片仍可說是只在上海並只以吳語進行方可成立的文本；它提供的是一套非生產性、同時高度去道德化的消費社會的感情圖景，而且特重女性切身的生活體驗：前現代的浪漫主義文化中的“癡情”/“愛情至上”，被指認為現代城市生活中的一種“神話”，它照亮了都市的夜空，卻也讓人們不以為意。另尤其體現劇作能力的一點是鞋匠的設置，這一掃地僧角色起到了故事旁觀者和“評點”者的作用。2021年12月24日於金逸達鏢。
今年院线片里比较令人感到惊喜的一部。坚固的东西都烟消云散了，但并非所有东西都消失了，那些琐碎的、已逝的甚至混乱的难道不是真实存在的吗？确实是中产趣味，但亦假亦真的那一笔有举重若轻的神韵
厌女和信奉孝道的社会里典型的、拧巴的母女关系。女孩子长大成人的过程，便是杀死体内那只红熊猫的过程。青春期萌芽的自我、作为一个真实的人奔腾不息的自然天性——这只红熊猫，被视作“红水・猛兽”，在“好女孩”“乖女儿”“女人味”的规训下，沿着祖母→母亲→女儿的代际链条，被一次次压抑、扼杀、窒息。真希望每个妈妈都能带女儿去看这部电影，不，每个女儿都能带妈妈去看这部电影。
不细究的话看着挺开心的。局促和做饭的部分最好，饭局对话略微生硬。再洋气的地儿，出现个叉着腰的保安，那就还是中国，可以多一点这样的部分。以及看完真饿啊，老白去B站做个美食博主肯定火…… 虽然上海女孩嗲，还是喜欢里头的北京大妞儿。半夜看完电影的北漂点了个烧烤，因为没有那么灵的点心可以吃😭
哭成泪人了 不想让妈妈失望不想让妈妈伤心怕不是中国女孩的default setting 那些谎言 那些挣扎其实只是为了安抚妈妈罢了 即使最有个性的女孩也摆脱不了“不想让妈妈如何如何”这种思维 我们自己内心禁锢了自己 觉得妈妈不会接受这样的我 挣扎一番发现 父母对自己照单全收 由此和父母和自己的关系进化到新的一层/最让我惊讶的是 最归驯的妈妈 内心的小熊猫反而是最大的 竹林中妈妈和meimei一路走来 从叛逆少女到穿着蓝绿色旗袍的贵妇 眼泪止不住 想起我妈妈说的“最幸福的时候当然是做女儿” 可最后还是变成了为了孩子而循规蹈矩的成年人 里面的小细节太抓人 午餐盒 学校窗户的偷窥和羞耻都让我感同身受 看完只感觉 好爱妈妈啊
伍迪艾伦应该讲过类似的纽约故事，但是本片非常上海小资味。只是在一个西部山区小县城的影院里，全场只有我一个人。中年小市民不讲爱情，但也自有其情感，马伊琍那个高跟牛仔裤配上休闲衬衫打领带，简直不要太帅。
就因为这部电影
不一样的地方是两性关系的设定不再刻板狗血，反而都是活生生有自己想法的独立人格人，每个年龄段都是。
映后看了一个采访导演
徐峥做监制还是厉害的，题材选的好，生活中的小细节可以说是面面俱到了。演员请的好，各有特色的35+女演员。上海话说的也好，方言出来的一瞬间，市井味儿扑面而来，这部电影错不了了。
喜欢喜欢 ，快俩小时了竟然没看够 就这种题材拜托电影院能多点，导演真的好会拍，特别第一场群戏那里节奏真的非常的棒，谈恋爱吗哪有那么多扭捏，哪有一定女的就要被动？
我就说一点，倪虹洁的各种热辣打扮，没有一个镜头是在聚焦她的身材和男人的反应的，但每一个她的镜头却都满溢着自由的吸引力。要表现一个性感女人给观众的第一印象不是从性吸引力入手，光这一点就吊打99%的国产同类型片。
配乐和台词都很认真花心思了
如今爱情神话已然凋谢，我们面对的只能是真实涌动的生活。在费里尼的电影被大众日常排除的当下，影片展示了两种态度：一者是同过去记忆一同消逝，一者是放弃泡影投入奔流的生活。对于怀旧神话的洗涤昭示着想要在变动的现实中再次搭建一个完整神话努力的徒劳。在最后，镜头由低向高缓缓移动直至平齐，此时被看的不再是费里尼，而是坐在荧幕前的观众本身，这也正是在暗喻我们与电影/艺术/文化的关系，神话性的凋谢证明着庞大坚固的神圣叙事不再有效，它将作为一个幻影/乌托邦而笼罩而非被信仰，涌动不息的生命之流与平等的对话变成真正的主角。但在这两种态度之外，一些徘徊在过去与现在之间久久游移的人却被遗忘了。高于生活之物被放弃，后现代不再追求超越性的生活态度既指向一种生命的旺盛生产，又以其灵晕的委顿带来无可医愈的伤痛。
还有什么好讲的？都给我狠狠得吹一波！都这年头这市场了还能把家长里短鸡毛蒜皮拍出了费里尼+伍迪艾伦的味道来还想咋滴？节奏牛得一批 没有浪费一个镜头 几首插曲也出现得恰到好处 最重要的似 阿拉就住在太原路 每天遛狗必经过片中的弄堂街道 亲切得不得了好不辣～
轻松好笑又有点生硬，用反转刻板印象来反对刻板印象，总觉得有在努力女权但又陷入了刻板的二元圈套，但是电影就像上海一样浮于表面却也挺乐呵。“乳化什么乳化！不要随便乳化好伐啦！”
我！真！的！太！喜！欢！了！
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